Coast Guard Believes Father Used Son As A Bobber While Marlin Fishing

June 29, 2014 • Dumbass of the Week, Events, Features, Sports, Worthy News

Hilton Head, SC – Clinton Askew, local Coast Guard Captain, would not have believed it if he didn’t see it with his own eyes.  Askew, a father of three, described the act as “the most appalling and despicable act I’ve seen in my 21 years on the water.”

What Askew and his team saw when they drove up beside a fishing boat was a young toddler floating out in the water.  He had a life jacket on and appeared to be having fun swimming.  Yet he was alone and about 100 yards off the back of the boat.  Upon closer examination, Askew could see that the boy was connected by fishing line and it looked like there was a large hook through the boy’s life preserver.  Askew and team trolled in even closer.  A man from the back of the boat was yelling at the boy.  “Flop around like a tuna.  Use your claws and pretend like your a lobster.”  Marlin began to jump around the boy and what appeared to be a shark dorsal fin was close by as well.  The man on the back of the boat yelled, “SoooooWeeee!” with unbridled excitement for what might happen next.

Askew and team swiftly moved in to rescue the young lad.  They escorted the fishing boat back to shore and each person on the boat was held for further questioning.  “You should see this kid in the YMCA pool,” explained the boy’s father.  “He’s meant to be in the water as much as possible.  He loves it.  Aquaman is already his idol.  Where are the great ocean divers these days?  Name one besides Jacques Cousteau.  One.  You can’t.  That’s what I thought.  I’m exposing my boy to more right now so that he can be the next great ocean explorer.  Every great adult has been pushed to the limits by their parents.  Some make it and some don’t.  That’s the chance you take for greatness.”

The man was taken into custody soon after his interview.  Captain Askew mistakenly punched the deranged father in the eye.  Askew explained that he was punching the wall in frustration and then the father just appeared before him at that very same time.  Askew was fully exonerated of any wrongdoing.

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